I think I’m on record with my love of list-making, and it’s fair to say I spend a fair amount of time fantasizing about being somewhere other than working or studying. Lately, I’ve combined the two into a list of fictional places I’d like to visit. I’m not saying I’d like to live at any of these places necessarily, but an afternoon there would not be out of order. I narrowed the list down to 10, making some hard cuts as I went.
The Night Circus. This was a book-group pick a few years back, and I really have never stopped thinking about it – the story, the writing, the imagery. Have I bought her new book? Of course! Have I opened it? No! (See above re: class.) The lighting of the clock? I would give up the 50 cents left in my 401(k) to witness that. The cloud maze? Yes, please. “There is no beginning. There is no end. Enter where you please, leave when you wish, have no fear of falling.”
Pine Valley, USA. Yeah, sue me. I was an avid All My Children watcher. Planned my days around it, learned to set a VCR because of it. Apparently, it was in suburban Philadelphia, which I do not believe and do not like and I’m happy I didn’t know that at the time. For a quiet suburb, a lot of shit went down in PV. You know what I’m talking about. I sooo would love to be lunching at The Chateau when Erica Kane Martin Brent Cudahy Chandler Roy Montgomery Montgomery Chandler Marick Marick Chandler breezed through the door. I would stop by the lake to scream, “Jenny! Get off that jet ski right this minute!” or “Nina! Wake up, you ninny! Mrs. “Sloane” is your grandmother!” Ooops, sorry for anyone who didn’t see that coming.
Rick’s Café Americain. Okay, if you don’t want to go here, check your pulse. There’s a lot of champagne cocktails being served, a jazzy piano player, and for the right person, some exquisite “jewelry” if you get my drift. If you don’t, you’re not allowed in. “What’s your nationality?” “I’m a drunkard.” Makes me laugh every single time I hear it.
Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse. (The one from the movie, not Disney World.) This swankienda in the treetops was the height (haha) of luxury to my seven-year-old self. I think I first saw it in the parish hall at Mt. Carmel when the CYO had movie night. (There was no shortage of G-rated movies there.) Those cool rope bridges and that skylight! Plus, it kept the tigers at bay. If you got bored, you could ride an ostrich if you got time off from making bombs to hurl at pirates. Bonus! You got to wear the mom’s frilly pink dress while you danced around with Fritz. (Take that, Ernst!)
The Castle in Enchanted April. I guess this is probably a real place, but it’s my list, so I get to make the rules. Because a month in San Salvatore sounds pretty darn great (except maybe not right now…). There’s a cook as I recall, so I’ll probably spend more than a day. Probably a month. Right after March. Wait a minute…. BRB, going to look for my passport.
Grace & Frankie’s beach house. Okay, I realize technically this is a real place, but again, I don’t care. It just seems like a super-cozy spot to spend some time. Comfy cushions, chairs overlooking the beach, a pool and a fridge that always seems to be stocked. I’m in -- as long we can 86 all the visitors.
Wallace and Gromit’s kitchen. I love breakfast, but I hate having to get up and actually make it. At W&G’s, I could have the best of both worlds. More really, if you think about it, since I won’t actually have to get out of bed to reach the kitchen table.
Manderley. Yes, I admit it’s creepy, but I’d like to just poke around without Mrs. Danvers skulking about. The gardens seem pretty nice, but I am staying away from the boat house.
Frasier Crane’s Apartment. #1901 at the Elliott Bay Towers on the Counterbalance in Seattle, which I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t have to Google. I don’t want to stay long, but I would like a tour and maybe a glass of wine. Why on earth with all that room is the kitchen so small?
Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. This is SUCH a no-brainer for any list like this that I almost left it off. I don’t want anything bad to befall me, and I’m not wild about being blasted out of a building in a glass elevator, but I’d totally be up for a tour and tasting.
So tell me, what fictional location would you like to visit?
